Hubby and I took Annabelle to Oklahoma City this past Monday to introduce her to a couple of relatives who haven't met her yet and let me tell you......we will not be doing *THAT* again anytime soon! Actually, let me rephrase that....we *ARE* planning a trip back out to OKC in January, but some of the relatives will be crossed off our "To Visit" list. I know there are relatives in OKC reading this blog, and I know there are relatives in Guthrie who are also reading this blog, so that means I can effectively use this blog as a means of communication since nobody up there bothers talking to each other.
Here's what happened: Hubby and I got up extra early for this trip. We got the baby fed, got the dog fed, packed a large bag of toys and snacks for Annabelle, gassed up the car and headed out. We stopped for breakfast shortly after we left and let Annabelle get out and run off some excess energy. Then we hit the highway and began the 4 hour trek to Oklahoma City. Our first stop was Grandma Margene's house. She seemed happy and excited about Annabelle and made a concentrated effort to find playthings for her great granddaughter, including a bottle of aspirin and plastic Wal-Mart bag. OK, that aside, she really did seem happy about Annabelle. Margene took us out to lunch (Thank you very much for that Margene, it was delicious!) and we had a nice conversation. Until we announced we had to leave to go visit Grandma Mercedes who, by the way, only lives about 3 miles away from Grandma Margene. Why couldn't we get both grandmothers together and spend one long visit with both of them together instead of two short cisits with each of them individually? Well, that's not possible because Margene and Mercedes HATE each other with a passion and refuse to even be in the same room with each other. So, for that reason, we have to cut our visit with Margene short and leave to go see Mercedes. I could tell that MArgene didn't want us to leave but, since she refuses to associate with Mercedes, there is no other way for us to do this. So, Margene stalls.....takes her sweet time getting out of the car.....tries to make last minute conversation....invites us in for "a little while".....offers her bed so that the increasingly tired and cranky Annabelle can take a nap before we go to see Mercedes, etc. We tell Margene that we really do need to head on out, so she reluctantly gets out of the car and goes into the house. We head over to Mercedes and along the way, Annabelle falls asleep. So we drive around for about 45 minutes, hoping she'll be a little bit refreshed when we get there.
We get to Mercedes' house and are greeted with open arms by a very sweet lady. I have never met this woman and Chris has only recently been back in touch with her. This is Chris's maternal grandmother (Margene is his paternal grandmother...I claim no relation to these people other than by marriage!) There is a rift between Chris's mother and *her* mother, Mercedes, that has been going on for 27 years. Nobody knows exactly what started this rift because everybody's version of the story is different and the story has changed several times over the course of time. I'm not even sure anybody remembers what the original argument was about. Anyhoo....
We spend a very lovely afternoon with a very sweet woman. She immediately presents Annabelle with a cute little pony purse that Annabelle loves. How very sweet of her to go out that morning and purchase it for our little girl! Thank you so much Mercedes! And, of course, I had to take a picture of the cute little pony purse, so here it is:
Mercedes invited us to dinner, but we already had dinner plans with George & Laura (Chris's brother and sister-in-law) and Grandma Margene. Mercedes didn't know that we were spending the evening with Margene and, for some reason, Chris didn't want to tell her. OK, whatever. Upon leaving, Mercedes also stalled and very clearly didn't want us to go. I can understand this, though, since this was her first time meeting Annabelle & me and we really didn't get to spend a lot of time there with her. She watched out the window until we were completely out of sight and I have to admit that I felt so sorry for her. She is so lonely and is ostracized from the family for who-knows-what reason. So we leave her house and head on back over to Margene's house, as were are to pick her up for dinner and then head on over to Red Robin to meet up with George and Laura and their 3 year-old son, Sam. Well, we are driving and shortly before we arrive at Margene's house we get a phone call from George. Let the stupidity begin.......
George informs us that he just received a phone call from Margene. Margene evidently does *NOT* want to join us for dinner because we had the gall to go over and visit Mercedes. Ummmmm......WHAT?!? She doesn't want to join us because...WHAT?!? I couldn't believe what I was hearing! *THIS* is the degree to which the pettiness and childish behavior run. People in this family stop associating with you if you have the nerve to speak with someone they themselves don't like. Well, long story short, George talked Margene into going to dinner with us anyway. Margene made it a point to sit next to me and get all snuggly and sweet with me. I just found out that this woman's animosity towards Mercedes is stronger than her desire to be with my daughter, and now I'm supposed to accept her snuggles and make nice-nice with her? That was irritating. However, the evening wasn't totally shot. George and Laura are the sweetest people in this family and their son is absolutely adorable. We had a wonderful time with them and would love to go back and visit them in more depth. They are fantastic parents and just overall good people. They gave Annabelle a nice gift bag filled with books (Annabelle's favorite!) and a cute little pink giraffe:
So, with everything that happened on this trip, Chris and I have decided that things will be much different the next time we go to Oklahoma City. This blog entry is to inform those relatives in Oklahoma that we don't appreciate some of this immature behavior and we aren't going to waste our time getting stuck in the middle of these ridiculous decades-long feuds. Chris & I spent a lot of time planning this trip out there, having to rearrange our schedules several times, only to be disappointed by the attitudes of those who are supposed to be our elders and, in essence, wise. So, here's what's going to happen the next time we go out to OKC. Margene...we will *NOT* be coming out to visit you anymore. If you ever want to see Annabelle again, you will have to make the 4 hour trek to Arkansas to see her. If you are going to get *THAT* upset that we are visiting Mercedes, then we will simply not inform you of any of our upcoming visits to OKC. We will visit Mercedes and George, Laura & Sam. You are no longer on our "To Visit" list.
To Dan & Linda (Chris's parents for those who don't know): I know you're reading this blog. Keep in mind, this is *MY* blog and I have every right to say what I want. I realize you both have a problem with me speaking my mind. You'd prefer that I sugarcoat everything and make it sweeter to swallow, but that's not gonna happen. You voluntarily chose to walk out of our lives several years ago for reasons that are still unclear. When you did this, you also walked away from any future grandbabies that might come your way through us. We don't know if you realized this when you disowned us, but it appears now that maybe you might be realizing that this was not the wisest decision you could have made. You are missing out on a lot. Annabelle is the sweetest and most loving baby alive...and you are missing it. I feel sorry for you. You missed her entry into this world. You missed everything in the first year of her life. You missed the first half of her second year of life. You missed her first smile. You missed her first giggle. You missed her first steps. I hope it was worth it. You both need to realize a few things...you will never get to Annabelle without going through me first. This means that calling Chris in the middle of the day while he's at work, i.e. when I'm not around, isn't going to get you any closer to meeting her. Your little trick of deciding to "stop by" one day when I just happen to be out of town....well, that's not going to work either. Seriously guys, think about what you're doing. Is your animosity towards me really so strong that you'd sacrifice a relationship with your granddaughter just so you can stay angry at me? If that's how you want it to be, then so be it! Annabelle has a set of grandparents who moved all the way out here from Florida just so they could be near her. She has grandparents here who love and adore her, and whom she loves and adores. So, that being said, we are awaiting a package from you. I suppose that's a first step but keep in mind....you backed yourselves into this corner, we never forced you in. In fact, we begged you not to go down this path but you refused to listen to us. You owe us an apology. You will get NOWHERE without one. So now you have to decide how important your granddaughter is to you. If you refuse to apologize, then you are also refusing a relationship with Annabelle. If that is the case, then you have no need to continue reading my blog......this blog is my gift to her and if you don't want to be a part of her life then I don't want you stalking her through my blog. At that point, it will only be a matter of time before I privatize it and lock you out. Think about that before you make your decision.
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