R.I.P. Steeler (June 14, 1996 - March 25, 2009)

Losing a loved one is always hard and it is something that we never completely recover from. Even when our loved one has four legs and and a tail, the loss is no less devastating. This morning when I woke up, I began my daily ritual with baby and dogs. Steeler was diabetic and arthritic, with limited vision and hearing. He was on a special diet, so I began every morning by preparing his food. As soon as he heard his dry dog food hit the bottom of his metal dish, he would come running and would be constantly under foot until his meal was finished. Then he would race me to the bathroom, where he ate his meals every morning and every evening (this way I could shut the door and not worry about a baby or animal getting in there and interrupting his meal!) After each meal, every dog would get a Milkbone (Steeler was special, so I always gave him two!) and then I gave Steeler his insulin injection. It was a good routine. This morning, however, Steeler didn't come running at the 'kerplunk' of his food falling into the dog bowl. I found his lifeless body in the living room, where it appears he simply collapsed while walking to the water bowl. My poor, unbelievably sweet little "puppy" has gone to the Rainbow Bridge and I am absolutely heartbroken.

A Temporary Reprieve

We received some fairly good news today on the job homefront. It seems we will be getting more unemployment benefits than we had originally been planned. The amount that we will evidently qualify for will be enough to cover the mortgage on our house. YAY! This means we can stay in our home for a little while longer before packing up and moving out to Georgia. We will have a little more breathing room than we were originally expecting, although we will be pinching quite a few pennies to make ends meet. That's OK, though, because we will be able to pay our mortgage. That was my biggest concern. I couldn't care less at this point whether or not our credit card bills get paid. Yes, there was a time when I did care that they were not only paid, but paid on time. It's amazing what a layoff will do to a person's priorities, though. Now my main concern is making sure we have a house to live in and food to eat every day. Hopefully I'll be able to prepare that food in a well lit room, providing we had enough money to pay the electric bill, but if not then....well, if we have a warm, dry place to sleep at night then I'll forego the lights. OK, I know it will never get that bad...but those kinds of thoughts run through my mind when faced with the very real fact that we have no reliable source of income right now. It is a scary and unsettling feeling. Anyway, now that we will be able to make the mortgage payment, we have decided to stay here in Arkansas until July and then, if Hubby is still unemployed at that time, we will put our house on the market and head on out to the Peach State. It was important to me to wait until July because I wanted to have Annabelle's 2nd birthday party out here where all her friends are.

And speaking of her birthday party.........yes I know it's still 4 months away, but I'm already starting to plan it and I'm thinking that this year we're going to do an "Abby" party. Abby Cadabby (from Sesame Street) is so cute and I think she will make the perfect theme for a 2nd birthday party. At this point in time, Annabelle does not show any preference for any particular character, so anything's a go right now. I really do appreciate these baby days when Annabelle is so easy to deal with. She'll be a teenager one day and during those days, when nothing I do will be good enough for her, I will look back fondly on these sweet, innocent Sesame Street days. Children grow up so darn fast and I want to cling to and treasure every moment in my little girl's life.

One Quarter......

.....of our time here in Arkansas is over. Since Hubby was laid off, we've given ourselves a two month time limit (when he will cease to continue being paid by his former employer) to find another job here before we have to (reluctantly) pack up and move. Hubby has now been out of work for a little over two weeks, making it one-fourth of our two month time limit. He's been searching and searching for a job, with no results. It's so frustrating, knowing that this economic downturn will eventually pass, but not knowing how long it will take just makes it a financially irresponsible decision for us to stay here and try to ride it out. If he doesn't find a job within the next six weeks, we are going to have a huge yard sale, sell everything and head on out to Georgia. My parents have a vacation home out there that they are offering to give us. They own it outright, so there will be no mortgage to worry about. Eventually, they will sell their house out here in Arkansas and move back to Florida. It will be so sad, not being able to see them every day (which I can do here, should I choose to!) but the location of their vacation home and the location of where they would like to purchase their next home, we will only be 1.5 - 2 hours away, so Annabelle will still get to see her Grandma and Grandpa on the weekends. I'm still so angry at Wal-Mart and have sworn to never EVER spend another penny in any of their stores EVER again! Target will get all of my business from now on! This was nothing but a greedy corporate move on their part.
Even though we still have 6 weeks here, I think I've pretty much got it set in my mind that Hubby isn't going to find a new job. Maybe he will, though, I just have a feeling that this isn't going to turn out well for us. I finally found a place I love...a place to call home....and I am being forced to uproot my life here and start fresh again somewhere else. I hate the ominous feeling in the pit of my gut. I am, however, eternally grateful to my parents for generously giving us their vacation home. They could have just as easily packed up and moved out there themselves (where they love it there so much more than they do Arkansas, which they hate!) yet they are allowing us to move out there instead, and choosing to stay behind in a state that they hate, just so that we won't fall into financial ruin due to our unfortunate circumstances. I am so blessed to have such incredible parents!

I have decided to go back to school to become certified as a pharmacy technician. It's a growing career field with very flexible scheduling options. My goal, if I manage to accomplish it, would be to work the overnight shift in a hospital...part time. It will give me something to do while earning a little extra money on the side. It's only a 48 hour course, which takes place over a 2 month span of time. Pharmacy technicians doen't make fantastic paychecks, but pharmacology is something I have always been interested in and becoming a pharmacist is out of the question for me at this point. But I'm leaving that dream open for another time. Ultimately I'd like to get into the field of nuclear pharmacology....making the radioactive medicines required for patients undergoing chemotherapy. We'll see how it goes, though. If we stay here in Arkansas, the training program begins in May and then again in July. If I am unable to stay here, I'm sure I can find the same training program out there in Georgia.

Every day I am truly amazed at the way my little Princess is growing and changing. She can say a handful of words now, including "juice", "tea", "baby", "bee", "bubble" and "doo doo" (which we learned during daily diaper duties!) And she can understand simple commands like "close the door", "throw that away", etc. and she will fetch objects when I ask her to (a book, her shoes, a particular toy, etc.) She is such a happy baby and an incredible blessing in my life. I honestly don't know how I ever managed to be happy before she came along and, upon closer examination of my life, I realize my definition of "happy" has changed since her arrival. She completes me.






Annabelle honestly thinks these Mr. Potato Head glasses were made for her face!








Annabelle's new favorite place to sit......the dog's empty food bowl!






Annabelle loves to wear Mommy's shoes, even if they are on the wrong way!







What is it with Annabelle's obsession with the dog's food bowl??







Bedtime has become an interesting event....with a new stuffed toy required every night. What happends when Annabelle can no longer fit in her own bed??






Annabelle and her friend, Wesley, wreak havoc in Mommy's kitchen!

"Restructured" Right Out of a Job

I guess it was only a matter of time before we finally felt the effects of the economic downturn. Hubby was "restructured" right out of his IT position at the Wal-Mart headquarters. After eleven years of faithful service, his position there "has been eliminated" and his services to this company are "no longer needed". UGH! What reason is there for a company that is making record profits to go and eliminate over 800 jobs?? Oh yeah, that's right....so they can make even MORE money! So now what? With over 800 displaced workers released into the realm of the unemployed, what are the chances that Hubby can find another job like the one he had? Over 100 of those 800 are IT people from Hubby's section, so that makes over 100 people applying for the same, oh, 4 jobs that MIGHT currently be open for IT people?! That's in addition to the hundreds of others who have been laid off from other companies. If Hubby can't find another job within the next 2 months or so, we will have to put the house on the market and move. I can't afford this house on my earnings alone. It's really sad that things have come to this. There was no reason at all for Wal-Mart to lay off so many people...not when they are one of the few companies still making obscene profits. And if we have to put the house on the market, we are going to take a serious hit. This house will probably not be appraised for anywhere near what we paid for it. We will lose money, no doubt about that, but we are trying to avoid a foreclosure (which is what will happen if Hubby can't find another job!) AAARRRGGGGHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!! If we do have to sell the house and leave, we will be headed back towards the east coast.


Annabelle is on this new book kick ... "Goodnight Gorilla". As soon as she goes into her room, she will immediately pick up the book and wait for me (or Daddy!) to sit down so that she can sit on a lap and have this book read to her. Fortunately the book doesn't have too many words, so it's kind of hard to get sick of the story. The illustrations are adorable, though. It'S really a cute book and Hubby and I get a kick out of alternating the voices of the animals, as well as throwing in some sound effects for good measure. Then when we're done, we have to start all over again from the beginning. This goes on and on for several readings. It's so cute!

OK, it's almost 2am and I am still on the computer. There is something wrong with this situation! I'm off to bed to try to get a good night's sleep in the midst of all the emotional chaos going on over here. Goodnight everybody!

Arkansas Ice Storm

There has been a lot of freaky weather lately all over the country it seems. Arkansas did not escape unscathed. While it does manage to snow every winter (for a day or two here and there) our winters are generally pretty mild compared to northern states. When it comes to ice storms, however, Arkansas reigns supreme. A few weeks ago we were hit with an ice storm that knocked our power out for about 3 days. We were VERY lucky though, as many people lost their power for 2-3 weeks at a time. We had several inches of ice layered over our driveway and all of our plants were killed in the storm (my fault for leaving them out there!) I put two brand new gallons of milk outside so they wouldn't spoil, along with the rest of the contents of the fridge, and the darn things froze solid! Two gallons of milk, frozen solid! I wasn't expecting that, as I had only put them out on the back deck AFTER the ice storm was over. I didn't even bury them in the snow or put them in the shade....they were right out in the Arkansas sunshine! It took several days for them to thaw out in the fridge. On top of that, there was not a bag of salt to be found anywhere.....three counties completely sold out of salt! It got to the point where we were out there with the Morton's table salt, as well as the last 2 boxes of ice cream salt that we were able to find at Wal-Mart. That was definitely *NOT* fun! And then when we lost our power and when I realized we were going to be out of power for quite awhile, the hunt was on for "D" batteries. Normally I keep batteries on hand, but I had used the last of them for one of Annabelle's toys and completely forgot to replace them. Sooooooo, my search for 6 batteries took me to 4 different stores where, I am firmly convinced, I purchased the last 6 "D" batteries in this town. During the last ice storm, I swore I would be more prepared for the next one. That didn't happen and I can only hope that I have learned my lesson and will be better prepared for the next ice storm!